What wedding blogs (including this one) don’t show

The way wedding magazines and blogs are structured—they’re a business. They’re making money by selling someone else’s wedding as inspiration for your wedding. By necessity, they’re going to skew towards photos that their audience (engaged coupes) can IMAGINE THEMSELVES IN. This means details, faceless portraits, photos of the bride that focus on how her dress fits, not how she feels. There are also no family photo lineups, not that many church ceremonies, and definitely no surprised faces when things go wrong, crazy memorable moments, things that reference an inside joke, photos of your favorite college buddies, or weird moments with your siblings. Sometimes these blogs and publications show photos that look like wedding photos but are just models posing in wedding clothes—also called styled shoots—which have NOTHING to do with the photographer’s ability and IMO shouldn’t be considered for publication at all unless they’re very clearly labeled. (I have never taken part in a styled shoot. Every wedding photo of mine you see will always be from a real wedding)

The truth is…when it’s your wedding…you probably want the weird ones too. The ones of your grandparents chuckling, the ones of people you love even if they’re not perfect.

This is why, before selecting a wedding photographer, you’ll be doing yourself a favor if you as to see a FULL GALLERY..

And here’s what I think you should look for (as a 14 year wedding photographer and as a 2023 bride)

-candids of people who aren’t conventionally attractive

-family portraits….lots of groupings, vertical and horizontal, well lit, with lots of space on the sides/top/bottom to give you options for how to frame them. Lots of groupings. These are the boring ones if it’s not your family…and the boring ones to TAKE even if it is your family…but trust me they are massively important.

-If you have a huge family, look for how they handle LAAAAAAARGE family portraits. Can you see everyone’s face? Is this photographer capable of organizing and documenting 100+ family members in a single image?

-photos without either the bride or groom

-well lit, well composed, well edited photos of candid moments that couldn’t be staged—like the boutinere

-details that aren’t just magazine worthy. Things like the memorial table for relatives who have passed is not usually a magazine moment…partly because it’s so personal…but if you put time, money, attention, energy, or thought into ANY detail, it should be seen in your photo album.

-cliche details: Not everyone has the money or energy to keep up with every single trend. The truth about weddings is that pampas grass and mason jars and burlap are all “out” but the fact that they were in for a long time means they are now AFFORDABLE. If your photographer only believes that your wedding details are worth photographing for their portfolio

-candid moments that are really candid. Portraits can look candid, but your photographer should also be prepared, talented, and paying attention to you enough to be able to capture moments where you really didn’t know they were there. Look for situations where there are more than just the couple in the frame, or candid moments that are sprinkled throughout the day, not just during “portrait time.”

-bonus points for good gallery organization. Not just the photographer’s favorite photos at the top and the rest of them dumped in a proverbial pile…but folders or divisions that can help YOU find the moments you are looking for. 1000 photos is a LOT. Organizing personal photos is a chore most of us hate. Your photographer should make that part easy for you. (My galleries download in folders based on part of the day, but they’re also organized for you chronologically

-A gallery being concise without too many duplicates is nice, but not strictly necessary. Too many similar photos of an event that you can never re-create might be obnoxious to look through, but is kind of a non-problem. A lot of photographers will include more photos ‘just in case you like one of these better than the others.” The only exception to this is when a gallery LOOKS full because there area. lot of photos, but not a lot of moments are captured. A good way to think about this is “what do I expect to see when I imagine my wedding day?”

-photos of a part of the day (like the ceremony or reception) taken from multiple angles and both close up and far away. You want to feel like you really saw the moment, not just a few shots of the whole room or only close ups. To tell the story fully you need big wide shots, close ups, and mid range.

-delivery method: do you get a dropbox file? Or is this a professional gallery website that makes it easy to find and download the photo youre looking for

-editing—do they edit the photos of the rest of the day with the same care that they put into the “portfolio photos”

And that’s what this whole thing is really about—is the photographer just thinking of their portfolio, or are they doing the job for YOU? Are they the historian documenting YOUR memories, your life, and your day. A great photographer should be able to produce gorgeous portfolio worthy images at YOUR wedding, and also capture everything that is meaningful to YOU even if it’s not meaningful to THEM. Even if it doesn’t help their career. You’re not hiring a wedding photographer to get you into vogue (maybe you are…but most of us aren’t). You’re hiring a wedding photographer to tell the story of your life. Vogue is going to accept 100 images and publish 12 of them—AND ONLY PHOTOS THEIR AUDIENCE WANTS—not stuff that is important to you as a couple. Your wedding day should be more like 500 to 1000 or even more photos to capture all the moments and memories.

Should every single image be as high quality, well lit, well composed, and “magazine worthy” as possible? Absolutely yes. Is it even more important to tell your story? EVEN MORE YES. There can always be another photoshoot. You only have one wedding, so your photographer better capture it WELL.

Want to see my full galleries? Inquire about your wedding here: